July 11, 2014

Chasing Tale [7/12/14]: What Would Jesus Trademark?

I read the other day from the AV Club that Tyler Perry has trademarked the phrase, "What Would Jesus Do?"

I just don't understand trademarks, I guess. As I see it, a certain level of both obliviousness and avariciousness is required to trademark such a long-standing phrase. It's a phrase so ubiquitous that the idea anyone, let alone a filmmaker, can now claim exclusivity for making money off of it just runs counter-intuitive to any supposed Christian intent. I am fairly confident that at no point during this process did Tyler Perry ask himself: What would Jesus do?

This little nugget of dipshittery further demonstrates how the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office specializes in the jumping of sharks these days, as the trademarks and patents they have been granted over the last few years are stymieing. 

As far as trademarking common phrases go, Tyler Perry now ranks among the elite of money-grubbing hacks alongside Donald Trump who trademarked "You're fired," and whats-his-face on Storage Wars who has an actual trademark on the word "Yup."

Maybe I should trademark the phrase "This movie sucks" and make a mint off all of the reviews for all future Aunt Madea movies.

Ah well, enough of that silly shit. More books are on my TBR pile. Check 'em out:


Domino Falls by Steve Barnes and Tananarive Due - A husband/wife collaboration with one grizzly-sounding novel involving infected people waking up as crazed maniacs. Not a cozy British mystery then, I'm guessing.

The Year I Died Seven Times #4 by Eric Beetner - The fourth installment in this serial novel came out in June. Only three more to go after this one and business is picking up.

Prodigal Blues by Gary A. Braunbeck - I wondered if I might ever find a Braunbeck novel in my bookshop meanderings and lucked out when I found this one. A non-supernatural horror novel no less.


The Engines of Sacrifice by James Chambers - I don't think I've ever read Chambers' work before, but I received this collection of Lovecraftian-style horror from Dark Regions Press, and it sounds pretty cool, so I'll definitely give it a chance.

Shadow Animals by Keith Deininger - A new novella that came out in June, this one features one of the creepier covers I've seen in a while. C'mon, dudes with antlers are totes creepy. 

The Remnant: Into the Collision by P.A. Douglas - Nothing like a good old armageddon via meteorites. Saw this one with a recommendation from Jonathan Maberry. Good enough for me.


Red by Jack Ketchum - I'm a dog lover, so if there's a book on this list that's bound to hit some trigger for me surrounding animal cruelty, it's this one. Granted, the book is more about the dog's owner exacting revenge on the scumbags that killed his dog.

Blood Games by Richard Laymon - I'm gradually finding Laymon novels here and there, and even found his titles are available as Kindle titles too. Neat-o. This one was on sale a little while back, so I scooped it right up.

Devourer of Souls by Kevin Lucia - I bought a copy of this during Kevin's launch party a couple weeks back. I've read some of his short fiction and really liked it, so this book of two connected novellas ought to be another example of Ragnarok Publishing's eye for talent.


Slob by Rex Miller - I can't remember where I first heard about this classic thriller novel. It was either a Stephen King blurb or a catchy plot summary in the back of one of my pulpy paperbacks of the era. Either way, it's on the Kindle Store now and subsequently on my Kindle.

Dark Water by Barry Napier - Barry sent me a review copy of his brand new thriller novel, and he even stopped by the blog recently with a guest post that you can check out here to learn a little more about the book.

The Stolen by Bishop O'Connell - A modern fairy fantasy tale, this one from Harper Voyager sounds quite promising, and it has a very evocative cover to go with it, too.


The Midnight Road by Tom Piccirilli - If recovering from a brain tumor isn't trying enough, Tom Piccirilli suffered a small stroke in June. Medical bills, y'all. I went and bought this book after hearing the news. I already a good number of his books, but not the thrillers published by Bantam a few years back. Until now.

Last One Alive by Kristopher Rufty - This one is a taut thriller novella with a couple short stories thrown in for good measure. I've only read a bit of Rufty's short fiction, so I figured it was time I added an actual novel to my Kindle--even if it's only a short one. But hey, it was only a buck when I bought it.

The Montauk Monster by Hunter Shea - If you're curious about Hunter's new novel, he stopped by the blog recently with a guest post that you can read here. A very cool sounding local legend I hadn't heard of until I heard about the novel.


The Sucky Life of Thomas Crow by Phillip Stanley - Here's a novella I received that involves a brow-beaten, down-on-his-luck schmo entranced by a vampiric goth girl. Oh, that old chestnut. :)

"Scavenger" by Timothy C. Ward - Set in Hugh Howey's Sand universe, Tim wrote a novelette here that works pretty darned well as a stand-alone. I'm more familiar with his work on Adventures in Sci-Fi Publishing, but the guy's got a knack for writing too.

The Cutie by Donald E. Westlake - I can't decide what sold me on this Hard Case Crime book more: the name on the cover or the cutie on the cover. Six of one, half a dozen of the other, I suppose.

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